.Stripes. All stock bar the k&n panel filter Silver Donating Members 8,061 Member For: 12y 9m 16d Gender: Male Location: Perth Posted 21/01/19 06:39 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 06:39 AM I agree, for the most part. But I guess that's the hard thing in this situation, as circumstances kinda made things really hard early on that neither of us really foresaw. When we got together I was working FIFO and things were actually super simple and there was heaps of excitement and things just worked. But then pretty much as soon as I changed jobs and started working in the city the GF had a friend visiting from overseas and staying with her for 3 months that had been organised before we even got together. Then Christmas, a couple of pre-organised OS trips and a bunch of wedding etc, we never really were able to settle into a routine since. So essentially the entire dynamic of our relationship shifted, but we didn't have the time to figure it out, so the relationship essentially ended up on the back burner and there ended up being a lot of resentment and stuff we didn't really get a chance to figure out. The fact that things got quite bad did open the way for some raw and honest discussion that otherwise wouldn't have happened, but needed to. And since then things, although undecided, have actually been better than they have in months. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Puffwagon Puff Gold Donating Members 15,999 Member For: 9y 11m Gender: Male Location: South Australia Posted 21/01/19 06:43 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 06:43 AM Well mate communication is a fairly important part of a relationship. Almost as important as cleaning up after yourself If you guys are talking about it then you might just be able to start a new dynamic and move past the hard times. Good luck anywayz. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.Stripes. All stock bar the k&n panel filter Silver Donating Members 8,061 Member For: 12y 9m 16d Gender: Male Location: Perth Posted 21/01/19 06:53 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 06:53 AM I honestly believe we can. And I think if we can actually prioritise the relationship for a while, learn how to communicate more effectively and to compromise so we both get what we want/need then everything else will get a lot easier. And we haven't been this "active" in as long as I can remember...and she's the one pushing for it. So I think that's of itself one of the most positive signs of all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Puffwagon Puff Gold Donating Members 15,999 Member For: 9y 11m Gender: Male Location: South Australia Posted 21/01/19 08:15 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 08:15 AM Haha I forgot to hang up some of the kids bedding from the wash today but it doesn't really matter when it's still sunny af and 35 degrees at 6:30pm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bloodycrashboy Feeling the Love :-) Bronze Donating Members 4,421 Member For: 11y 8m 28d Gender: Male Location: Not in Cairns anymore Posted 21/01/19 08:42 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 08:42 AM (edited) 2 hours ago, Princess Fluffy said: Relationships are like farts.... if u have to force it then it’s probably chit. when you find your great love or the one, you just know it... and that doesn’t mean it’s always hunky dory, but you just know because the thought, the genuine thought, of ever being without them... even in the bad times... makes u feel sick to the stomach and no matter what happens, you work through it because you both want to not because you have to loads of ways to skin a cat in this world. I totally agree with Fluff..............Farrrrk, what did I just say? looking back on mine and Mrs BCB's relationship (which is now into it's 33rd year) the" honeymoon stage" has really never stopped, just slowed down a bit (thankfully) not saying that sex is all there is in a relationship, but we both value it high on our list of priority's we were inseparable for the first 5 years obviously we have had ups and downs, but the downs have been few During the first few years of our relationship I never really thought much of it, we just did everything together the only time we were apart was when we were at work we lived and breathed each other I'm not saying to you @.Stripes. that this is how your relationship should be, as Fluff said, everyone is different and what works for one, doesn't for another but what I am saying is what your girl is saying, "things shouldn't be this hard, surely".. For me, that is a warning that things will turn sour down the track but this is just my opinion Edited 21/01/19 08:44 AM by bloodycrashboy 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Jeturbo Bob the Freaking Builder Donating Members 10,813 Member For: 15y 3m 16d Gender: Female Location: SA Posted 21/01/19 08:53 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 08:53 AM 26 minutes ago, bloodycrashboy said: During the first few years of our relationship I never really thought much of it, we just did everything together the only time we were apart was when we were at work we lived and breathed each other This is me and j@ to a tee. We were inseparable from pretty much the moment we met, which is weird coz we’re not the romantic types pre being together. We literally had every disadvantage throw our way and still spent nearly 100% of time together and would move heaven and earth just to get an extra ten minutes together. Two babies, pnd, depression, 2 major deaths, and some pretty serious other stuff and yeah we’ve had our fair share of crap times... but to this day all I wanna do is hang with him over and above anyone else on the face of the earth, we’re best friends. I think its it’s hard if you haven’t had that kinda connection with someone to identify what it feels like, and to be fair until recently I never appreciated to it’s full extent how special it is. Stripes you will figure it out and move forward either way, it’s a positive.... you’re a really nice guy and you deserve to be happy and I’m sure either way, weather she’s the one or not, you will find that happiness moving forward. Best of luck with the communication thing and if she’s willing to come to the party then it’s a huge step forward! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.Stripes. All stock bar the k&n panel filter Silver Donating Members 8,061 Member For: 12y 9m 16d Gender: Male Location: Perth Posted 21/01/19 09:07 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 09:07 AM Thanks fluff, means a lot. Things were like that at the start but just the way things panned out changed that dynamic entirely and we didn't really have the opportunity to deal with that. This weekend and today feel very much like they did back then, like the honeymoon phase is back. So I feel like it could still work. We've just both been very independent for most of our lives and her family never really talked about feelings or emotions...so it doesn't come naturally to her. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Jeturbo Bob the Freaking Builder Donating Members 10,813 Member For: 15y 3m 16d Gender: Female Location: SA Posted 21/01/19 09:22 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 09:22 AM If you’re still feeling that spark despite all the crap that you’ve been through then that’s a massive win! Go for it bud... nothing to lose on a side note... bought a pretty cool beach tent today, some awesome beach stuff for huds to play with and even found some swimmers that fit me for once. Cant wait to be chilling by the water in a couple days!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Puffwagon Puff Gold Donating Members 15,999 Member For: 9y 11m Gender: Male Location: South Australia Posted 21/01/19 11:25 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 11:25 AM Holy sheeit. So many members online! What's up you bunch of turbo car nuts?!?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Andrew Gold Donating Members 2,036 Member For: 9y 8m 7d Gender: Male Location: Canberra ACT Posted 21/01/19 11:39 AM Share Posted 21/01/19 11:39 AM I picked up this today to fix my previous indiscretion 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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