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Dictionary For Decoding Women/men


ZAP

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What Sex are They?

ZIPLOC BAGS –

male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them.

SHOE –

male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.

TIRE –

male, because it goes bald and often is over inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOON –

male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it ... and, of course, there's the hot air part.

SUBWAY –

male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

HAMMER –

male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

REMOTE CONTROL –

female! .... Ha! You thought I'd say male. But consider, it gives men pleasure, he'd be lost without it,

:pooh:

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  • Just because it is, doesn't mean it should be.....
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:kiss: MY  :bum:

and your name is Ballbreaker  ???   why??     :spit:

Well couldnt call myself BALLSBROKEN could I :blush:

:bum:

:pooh::biggrin:

pay that one

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Friendship Among Women:

A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. Not one of them knew anything about it.

Friendship Among Men:

A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a mate's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed that he was still there.

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Friendship Among Women:

A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. Not one of them knew anything about it.

 

Friendship Among Men:

 

A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a mate's house.  The woman called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two  claimed that he was still there.

ahahahahh LOL

nice.. so true!

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  • Just because it is, doesn't mean it should be.....
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HOW MEN LIE

"Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive. "

"Tim Allen quote"

"IM GOING FISHING"

Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously

stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in

my hand, while the fish swim by in

complete safety."

"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".

Means: "I can't hear the game over

the vacuum cleaner."

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"

Means: "I have no idea how it works."

"I CAN'T FIND IT."

Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands,

so I'm completely clueless."

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"

Means: "What did you catch me at?"

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."

Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF,

IT'S NO BIG DEAL."

Means: "I have actually severed a limb,

it will bleed to death before

I admit that I'm hurt."

:spoton:

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