Jump to content

Joke Of The Day


XRSICKT

Recommended Posts

  • Xtreme Xalted Member
  • Donating Members
  • Member For: 21y 7m 6d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: BrisVegas

I was in the Bar (A lot) at the ANA Hotel during INDY.

Anway, sometime in the early hours of Saturday morning, This Bay mare walks in and fronts up to the bar.

Now, stop me if you've heard it.......

The barman says "G'day young filly, why such a long face"?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest petrol_dan
  • Guests

The teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just pitched a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that! The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern times. You gotta let your rose buds show!" and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes down stairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate... The grandmother says, "Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can show off your rose buds, then I can display my hanging baskets.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Gandalf the Grey, Maiar of Manwë and Varda, Team HgAg/Sneaky
  • Member
  • Member For: 21y 5m 11d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: The Shire, Middle Earth
Another Team HgAg meeting

Bloody Vader ate all the lamintons again! :angry:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Member
  • Member For: 22y 1m 2d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Perth

A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman.

He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.

The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"

"No", he replies, "I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it."

The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"

"It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me," he explains.

"What's it telling you now?"

"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties..."

The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken then because I am wearing panties!"

The man explains, "damn thing must be an hour fast."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Member
  • Member For: 22y 1m 2d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Perth

WIFE: "If I died first, would you remarry?"

HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"

WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"

HUSBAND: "Of course I do."

WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"

HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."

WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."

HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).

WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"

HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"

WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"

HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."

WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"

HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."

WIFE: - - - silence - -

HUSBAND: "s**t."

:thumbsup:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • I'm Back!! Thats right, long over due! :)
  • Lifetime Members
  • Member For: 22y 1m 8d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: West Brisbane
Another Team HgAg meeting

Bloody Vader ate all the lamintons again! :angry:

Aniken! You haven't deserted Team Blueprint? Ken those lamingtons must be good.

:thumbsup:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
  • Create New...
'