Corzza 777 Member 7,135 Member For: 15y 8m 20d Gender: Male Location: Neutral Bay. Born and Bred in the RSA Posted 03/12/11 02:12 AM Share Posted 03/12/11 02:12 AM A young 7 year boy goes up to his father and asks him, 'Dad, what is the difference between "potentially" & "realistically"?'He thought for a moment, then answered, 'Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars.Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that.'So the boy went to his mother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?'The mother replied, 'Of course I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!'The boy then went to his sister and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?'The girl replied, 'Oh my Gawd! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts?'The boy then went to his brother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?''Of course,' the brother replied. 'Do you know what a million bucks would buy?'The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad.His father asked him, 'Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?'The boy replied, 'Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million dollars ...But 'realistically', we're living with two hookers and a queer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corzza 777 Member 7,135 Member For: 15y 8m 20d Gender: Male Location: Neutral Bay. Born and Bred in the RSA Posted 04/12/11 08:59 PM Share Posted 04/12/11 08:59 PM Wife: What are you doing?Husband: Cleaning the house from flies and I killed 2 males and 3 females flies..Wife: How do you know their gender?Husband: I know because 2 were sitting on beer bottle and 3 were over the phone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howsee Donating Members 785 Member For: 17y 15d Gender: Male Location: Carindale, Brisbane Posted 04/12/11 10:31 PM Share Posted 04/12/11 10:31 PM Lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howsee Donating Members 785 Member For: 17y 15d Gender: Male Location: Carindale, Brisbane Posted 04/12/11 10:48 PM Share Posted 04/12/11 10:48 PM What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob???If we don't get some support in here soon everyone will think we're nuts!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buf-Phoon loitering with intent Lifetime Members 13,318 Member For: 21y 2m 2d Gender: Male Location: Zombie Birdhouse Posted 04/12/11 10:55 PM Share Posted 04/12/11 10:55 PM nuts that size , go see your GP at the very least LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corzza 777 Member 7,135 Member For: 15y 8m 20d Gender: Male Location: Neutral Bay. Born and Bred in the RSA Posted 05/12/11 07:55 PM Share Posted 05/12/11 07:55 PM A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony....On his first day there, he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around.A gorgeous petite blonde walks by and the man immediately gets an erection.The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, 'Did you call for me?'The man replies, 'No, what do you mean?'She says, 'You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me.'Smiling, she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him have his way with her.The man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna and as he sits down, he farts.Within minutes, a huge, hairy man lumbers out of the steam-room toward him, 'Did you call for me?' says the hairy man.'No, what do you mean?' says the newcomer.'You must be new,' says the hairy man, 'it's a rule that if you fart, it implies that you called for me.' The huge man easily spins him around, bends him over a bench and has his way with him.The newcomer staggers back to the colony office, where he is greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist, 'May I help you?' she says.The man yells, 'Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the £500 membership fee.''But, Sir,' she replies, 'you've only been here for a few hours. You haven't had the chance to see all our facilities.'The man replies, 'Listen lady, I'm 68 years old.I only get an erection once a month.I fart 35 times a day!!' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corzza 777 Member 7,135 Member For: 15y 8m 20d Gender: Male Location: Neutral Bay. Born and Bred in the RSA Posted 08/12/11 08:44 PM Share Posted 08/12/11 08:44 PM On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe.The proud husband says, "My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe." The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished."Oh, oh, aaaahhh," he exclaims, "**** you are so beautiful, let me take your picture.Puzzled she asks, "My picture?" He answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever".She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower.He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now."At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture".He beams and asks why and she answers, "So I can get it enlarged!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timmy Massive Tool Donating Members 567 Member For: 16y 1m 8d Gender: Male Posted 09/12/11 04:37 AM Share Posted 09/12/11 04:37 AM (edited) A very tall man walks into a bar, and a lady recognizes him as real Rugby player. They start to talk and eventually go back to his place. They start to kiss, and the man takes off his shirt. On his arm, he has a tattoo that says REEBOK."What's that for?" the lady questions. "Oh, I have this so that when I'm on TV, people will see my tattoo, and Reebok pays me." Then the man takes off his trousers, and on his leg, he has a tattoo that says NIKE. 'What's that ?' the lady questions again. "Just like the Reebok tattoo, I get paid when this tattoo is seen on TV." Then the man drops his underwear and on his pen*s he has a tattoo that says AIDS. The lady screams: "Don't tell me you have AIDS!" The man replies: "No, no... Calm down... It will say ADIDAS in a minute." Edited 09/12/11 04:39 AM by timmy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howsee Donating Members 785 Member For: 17y 15d Gender: Male Location: Carindale, Brisbane Posted 10/12/11 12:22 AM Share Posted 10/12/11 12:22 AM Bahahahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
f6mark Member 2,908 Member For: 13y 8m 7d Gender: Male Posted 10/12/11 01:47 AM Share Posted 10/12/11 01:47 AM (edited) Nuuuurs. Edited 10/12/11 01:47 AM by f6mark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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