Joke Of The Day

[Blown BA]

A MAN'S PRAYER

Our beer

Which art in bottles

Hallowed be thy sport

Thy will be drunk

I will be drunk

At home as I am in the pub

Give us each day our daily schooners

And forgive us our spillage

As we forgive those who spillest against us

And lead us not into the practice of poofy wine

And deliver us from Tequila

For mine is the bitter

The chicks and the footy

Forever and ever

Barmen

[Turbo6man]

3 couples die in a plane crash.

All went to heaven and were lined up waiting to speak with St Peter.

The first English couple were speaking to St Peter who said "I'm sorry but we can't let you in - all your life you have been dominated by alcohol, you even married a woman named Sherry!"

St Peter then spoke to the American couple and said "sorry but you can't come in either - all your lives you have been dominated by money, you even married a woman named Penny!"

The Irish husband looked at his wife and said "Lets go Fannie, we haven't got a chance.

[Slymeat]

A man walks into the bedroom with a duck under his arm. He looks at hi wife and says this is the pig that I'm fcuking, his wife says it's not a pig it's a duck. The man says I was talking to the duck.

[Blown BA]

What's the difference between a British policeman and an American policeman? British policemen say "This statement is a true representation of the facts..." An American policeman would say 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this sh*t...

[Blown BA]

Three sex experts were in a meeting explaining the reports they had just finished. The first expert said it cost him 2 million dollars to find out why a man's pen*s head is wider than the shaft: because it pleases the woman more. The second expert said it cost 3 million dollars to find out why the head is wider than the shaft: because it pleases the man more. The third expert said it cost him only 50 dollars to find out why: because it kept him from accidentally hitting himself in the forehead when he masturbated.

[Blown BA]

One day Mr. Smith, the president of a large corporation, called his vice-president, Dave, into his office and said, "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off."

Dave looked at Mr. Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I don't know whom to fire."

The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to come in, so Dave said, "Barbara, I've got a problem. You see, I've got to lay you or Jack off and I don't know what to do?"

Barbara replied, "You'd better jack off. I've got a headache."

[Turbo6man]

Roy always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly.

He walks into the house and says to his wife: "Notice Anything different about me?"

Betty looks him over "Nope."

Frustrated, Roy storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back into the room completely naked, except for the boots. Again, he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different NOW?"

Betty looks up and says, "Roy, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow.......

Furious, Roy yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN,

BETTY? IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW

BOOTS!!!!!"

To which Betty replies: "Shoulda bought a hat, Roy. Shoulda bought a hat."

[Guest]

Q: What's the difference between a gynecologist and a geneologist?

A: One looks up the family tree, and the other looks up the family bush.

Geea.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Whats the difference between KFC and the family bush???

Nothing!

Their both finger licking good :lol:

vik of the overboost

[geea]

Q: What's the difference between a gynecologist and a geneologist?

A: One looks up the family tree, and the other looks up the family bush.

Geea.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Whats the difference between KFC and the family bush???

Nothing!

Their both finger licking good :lol:

vik of the overboost

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

But only one tastes like chicken.

Geea. :o

[Guest]

vik of the overboost