surfsup Member 13 Member For: 20y 10m 11d Location: sydney Posted 20/09/04 09:50 PM Share Posted 20/09/04 09:50 PM question? "if you have a donkey, and I have a roosterand your donky eats both of my roosters feet what have you got?"answer........2.......feet ....of my ....cock ......in your ......ass!!!lol:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JB Forum Superhero Donating Members 3,109 Member For: 21y 2m 23d Location: Eastern Suburbs of Mexico Posted 21/09/04 01:30 AM Share Posted 21/09/04 01:30 AM Mr Honda, of the Honda Motor Corporation, died and went to heaven for judgement. At the gates, St. Peter told Mr Honda, "since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."Mr Honda thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God. I have a question for Him".St. Peter took Mr Honda to the Throne Room and introduced him to God.He then asked God, "Aren't you the inventor of women?" God Said, "Ah, yes. Indeed I am"."Well," said Mr Honda, "Professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your design."1- There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion.2- It chatters constantly at high speeds.3- Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much.4- The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.5- Plus the monthly down time and aggravation are outrageous, and don't even get me started talking about the maintenance costs."Hmmmm, you do raise some good points" replied God, "Lets have a wee look."God went to his Celestial super computer, typed in a few things and waited for the results. After a moment God said, "Well, it may be true that my invention seems to be flawed, but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours.." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blown BA In Your Face Member 6,195 Member For: 21y 11m 10d Gender: Male Location: Peninsula Posted 21/09/04 06:43 AM Share Posted 21/09/04 06:43 AM A new two year degree is being offered at Life University...Becoming a Real Man!That's right, in just six terms, you too can be a real man.Please take a moment to look over the program outline:FIRST YEARAutumn ScheduleMEN 101...Combating StupidityMEN 102...You too can do houseworkMEN 103...PMS - Learn when to keep your mouth shutMEN 104...We do not want sleazy underthings for ChristmasWinter ScheduleMEN 110...Wonderful Laundry TechniquesMEN 111...Understanding the female responses to getting in at 4 a.m.MEN 112...Parenting: It doesn't end with conceptionMEN 113...Get a life, learn to cookSpring ScheduleMEN 120...How NOT to act like an as*hole when you're wrongMEN 121...Understanding your incompetenceMEN 122...You, the weaker sexMEN 123...Reasons to give flowersSECOND YEARAutumn ScheduleSEX 101...You CAN fall asleep without itSEX 102...Morning Dilemma: If it's awake, take a showerMEN 201...How to stay awake after sexMEN 202...How to put the toilet seat downWinter ScheduleMEN 210...The remote control: Overcoming your dependenciesMEN 211...How NOT to act younger that your childrenMEN 212...You too can be a designated driverMEN 213...Honest - You don't look like Russel Wong - Especially nakedSpring ScheduleMEN 220...Omitting @#%! from your vocabularyMEN 221...Fluffing the blanket after farting in not necessaryMEN 222...Real men ask for directionsMEN 223...Thirty minutes of begging is not considered foreplay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blown BA In Your Face Member 6,195 Member For: 21y 11m 10d Gender: Male Location: Peninsula Posted 21/09/04 06:43 AM Share Posted 21/09/04 06:43 AM An English teacher was explaining to his students the concept of gender association in the English language.He stated how hurricanes at one time were given feminine names and how ships and planes were usually referred to as "she". One of the students raised their hand and asked - "What gender is a computer"?The teacher wasn't certain which it was, so he divided the class into two groups, males in one, females in the other, and asked them to decide if a computer should be masculine or feminine. Both groups were asked to give four reasons for their recommendation. The group of women concluded that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because:1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on. 2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless. 3. They are supposed to help you solve your problems, but half the time they ARE the problem. 4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.The men, on the other hand, decided that computers should definitely be referred to in the feminine gender because: 1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic. 2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. 3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval. 4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blown BA In Your Face Member 6,195 Member For: 21y 11m 10d Gender: Male Location: Peninsula Posted 21/09/04 06:45 AM Share Posted 21/09/04 06:45 AM Yesterday, after extensive testing, scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones... yes, it's true.To prove their theory, the scientists had 100 men consume 12 bottles of beer.They then observed that 100% of them:1: Gained weight.2: Talked excessively without making sense.3: Became emotional.4: Called home just to see if anyone called.5: Couldn't drive.6: Went to the bathroom in groups.7: Rearranged the furniture for no apparent reason.No further testing is planned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falchoon I see red Member 5,758 Member For: 22y 2m 2d Location: nowhere in particular Posted 21/09/04 10:49 AM Share Posted 21/09/04 10:49 AM Quality not quantity is what we're after Blown BA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cro Flower Power Lifetime Members 6,114 Member For: 22y 4m 8d Gender: Male Location: Sydney Posted 21/09/04 01:33 PM Share Posted 21/09/04 01:33 PM "She sells C cells by the sea shore." Quality not quantity is what we're after Blown BAYour one to talk Ross.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GlennAUII Former XT pilot Lifetime Members 4,791 Member For: 21y 6m 26d Gender: Male Location: The Womb Posted 21/09/04 01:37 PM Share Posted 21/09/04 01:37 PM heres a laugh! :lol:LINK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falchoon I see red Member 5,758 Member For: 22y 2m 2d Location: nowhere in particular Posted 22/09/04 01:45 AM Share Posted 22/09/04 01:45 AM Noice home page in your profile Glenn, self portrait is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geea Site protagonist Lifetime Members 4,320 Member For: 21y 9m 7d Gender: Male Location: At the lights, waiting for you. Posted 22/09/04 02:01 AM Share Posted 22/09/04 02:01 AM Noice home page in your profile Glenn, self portrait is it? Geea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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