Jump to content

Joke Of The Day


XRSICKT

Recommended Posts

  • Lifetime Members
  • Member For: 21y 8m 8d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: sydney

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war. After his talk he opens the floor to questions. One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is. "Billy." "And what is your question, Billy?" "I have 3 questions. First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? And third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?"

Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume George says, "OK, where were we? Oh that's right - question time. Who has a question?" Another little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him what his name is. "Steve" "And what is your question, Steve?" "I have 5 questions.

First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Fourth, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early? And fifth, what the f**k happened to Billy?"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Team Bute
  • Donating Members
  • Member For: 21y 4m 26d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Adelaide

Subject: : A Teacher's nightmare.

You MUST read this brief story before viewing the attached photo.

A class of primary children started a class project to make a plant pot to take home. The teacher wanted to have a plant in it that was easy to take care for, so it was decided to use cactus plants. The children were given greenware pottery in the style of a clown plant pot. They painted them with glaze and had them professionally fired at a class outing so they could see the process.

It was great fun. They planted the cactus seeds in the finished planters and they grew nicely. Unfortunately, however, they were not allowed to take them home. The cactus plants were removed, replaced with a small ivy, and the children were then allowed to take them home. The teacher said cactus “seemed like a good idea at the time”...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest BlackMagic
  • Guests

'Dog For Sale'

This guy sees a sign in front of a house..."Talking Dog for Sale"

He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard.

The guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the mutt replies.

"So, what's your story?"

The mutt looks up and says "Well, I discovered this gift pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, cause no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.

I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running.

The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger and I wanted to settle down.

So I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.

I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals. Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed.

He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

The owner says "Ten dollars."

The guy says he'll buy him but asks the owner,

"This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him?"

The owner replies, "He's such a f-cking liar."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Site protagonist
  • Lifetime Members
  • Member For: 21y 6m 29d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: At the lights, waiting for you.
that's not me! I got it from the same place velvet glove got his avatar from, "www.uglypeople.com"

:blink: You mean Velvet Gloves avatar isn't Velevt Glove. :blush:

Geea. :thumbsup:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Site protagonist
  • Lifetime Members
  • Member For: 21y 6m 29d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: At the lights, waiting for you.
Dont speed for at least a couple of months Geea!!!!

vik

I'm just hoping that the long arm of the law isn't long enough to reach from Canberra to Melbourne. :huh:

Geea. :eyebrows:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
  • Create New...
'