Can Best Friends Ever Be Life-time Partners?

[jetute]

I havn't felt such sadness for a person for a Long time, man I hope you can put some structure back in your life soon.

Wife: It sounds like me you are better off without her, I know how they feel when Pregnant 3 (Kids), but she was well out of line blaming you for the death of your first child, I only hope your next child can be in a more loving relationship.

Strike one for X

Mother: I nearly cried when I read what she did, My Mum is my mate, she is still one of my closest freinds, I can only imagine how you feel, I am scared to think what I would do if that were to happen to my Mum, I dont see how you could ever forgive your X for not telling you of your Mums intentions. Strike two for X.

Mother in Law: your x has filled you MIL with crap, she has assumed the worst of you, nice to see what they really think of you,

Strike Three for the X.

I dont see how you can ever go back, she will be wanting you back because she hasn't got something else to go to, if she did, she would not even talk to you, Belive me I know, they will look after number 1, then think about you.

Walk away and dont look back.

Your best friend:

She sounds like a champ, She has stuck by you, she respects you, and sounds as if he may also have feelings (no dates), take it slow, if it happens, fine, but dont push it, no women wants to be "Rebound Chick", It sound like you are already great freinds, which is more important in a relationship or marriage than you can imagine.

I hope you guys can become more than friends, you really need it now, And three cheers for having the balls to get up and tell a very sad and lonley tale, I doubt I would have the guts to do it, well done mate.

Chin up, it can only get better, and I hope it does soon, remember, you have lots of friends here, Stay strong.

well said

hope it all works out the way you want it to DR Z

[ZAP]

Dr. Z,

Thank you for coming online and telling your tragic story, it is not an easy thing to do, but you can be assured that your true offline and online friends are standing by you.

Do not make any rash decisions with your lady friend as she may feel like the rebound and you need someone to hug and be a friend, not a relationship. Do not rush and learn to be single again before you try to make a move.

If she makes the first move then, GO FOR IT.

Best of all you have a lot of people here that care about you, even though they may not have met you, you must be a top bloke because you have a T

[Buf-Phoon]

Dr Z , mate I think you better give it a hit ole son

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Dr Z , please accept my apologies for my tongue in cheek post. This was posted before any of the background was available. Consider it rescinded in full

That said if it is going to happen with your soul mate of its own volition let it. IMO things in life happen for a reason. I truly believe that you have more than passed any test that can be expected of an individual and that only good can now lie in front of you.

Wishing you all the very best of everything for the future and may 2006 bring you something special and unique

[bcl]

Dr Z,

Words cannot express my deepest sympathy with what you have had to endure in recent times.

I cannot pretend to be any sort of expert in the way women think, as I have been with my wife for 31 years, although I know that forming any sort of relationship with any other woman would not be well received…. although it is unnecessary as I consider my wife to be my soul-mate.

The soul-mate you describe is an incredible asset to you, and you should be extremely grateful for the support that she has and continues to give you. Perhaps something more can come of that relationship; that is your decision.

Sorry to also hear about your licence, although it really is trivial compared to the personal loss that you have suffered.

Be positive for the future, as it will take time to rebuild your life.

If you want to catch up some time for a talk over a drink or coffee you have my number… you just have to call.

You’re certainly welcome to join us on a cruise, so you don’t forget what the T can do.

regards,

Brian

[Dr Z]

My 400th post. All you folks are awesome. Thanks for the great encouragement and support.

I cannot even begin to describe the heartache of going through for the first time:

* Each monthly anniversary of Mum's passing - 23rd of each month

* Mother's Day - May

* Mum's birthday - 15th August

* My baby boy's birth and funeral day - 20th November

* My birthday - 2nd December

..and now, soon coming up..

* Christmas with NO family.

* Mum's first year anniversary - 23rd January 2006

I hope there is some real value for each of us when we can share unique stories as unique individuals. While we may have unique perspectives with unique lives, each of us has stories with common threads of grief, sorrow, heartache, pain, joy, happiness, contentment, passion...the full spectrum of human emotions moves us in our life. How strange it is that grief and sorrow can bring people closer together than happiness ever can.

"When all is said and done, your family and friends are number one."

"Friends are hugs from God".

Take a bow everyone. You each uniquely represent what is best about our community. I genuinely and sincerely wish the very best in life for you and all your dear ones.

Zelko aka Dr Z

[stang]

So u coming round xmas day? Always a spare seat at our house.

Mind you we are in vic.

[IH8TOADS]

Dr Z, that's just ?? words can't describe that. But just remember, hold that head up high...............ALWAYS. Your not at fault and from what I read your genuine good fella......things can and will get better. Best wishes for the future mate, sounds like your onto a good thing.

[phantomchic]

Dr Z,

My deepest sympathy for you.

You have endured so much.

I admire your strength to keep on keeping on and being able to openly share your pain.

Keep your friend at your side, true and loyal friends are so special. When the time is right you will know without question that both of you are ready for more.

shazzy

[XRBloke]

DR Z, man if you ever come to QLD let us know coz im buying you a beer, or maybe a keg depending on how long your here for! Sounds like you have had a tragic past 12 months. The only thing I can possible add to what the others have said here (that's if someone hasnt already) is that bad times don't necessarily last for ever and they always make you a stronger / better person, even though its extremely hard to get over the loss of 2 very important people in your life, something I guess some of us could never comprehend.

As for your lady friend, if things feel right between you two then really there should be nothing stopping you, as im sure you already know we only live once and really should make the most of the time we have.

As for best friends being life time partners, unfortunately it hasnt gone that way for me with two girls I have which are and have been very good friends with me in the last 10 years or so, one in which I went to school with and the other which I once lived next to, who I keep contact with on a weekly, if not daily basis in some cases. Both these chicks are taken now which doesn't help my chance of any future relationships with them, one in particular I have liked for a while more then just on a friendly basis, but I am more worried about her happiness, as she seems to be happy with the guy shes with, even though hes done some extremely silly things to her in the last 18 months!

I guess life works differently for everyone, but I think if a girls good enough to be your best friend and soul mate then she should easily be good enough to be your better half.

[F6 UTE]

Women are, and always will be impossible creatures. We love them, hate them and adore them at the same time. They bring heartache, pain and happiness in the same breath.

I have been with my wife 12 years, meeting in High School. We are the stereo-typical 'high school sweethearts'.

There was no initial attraction between us, just a mutual friendship which developed out of school to something more. We were not 'best friends' but enjoyed the company of each other, and chatted for 3/4/5 hours on the phone.

In my opinion, if we are looking for love, it cannot be found. Love is something that takes us unaware and hits you blindside. In the most unexpected places, at the most inappropriate time. The reason for this?? In times of need, or distress, we see things in a light not shone in normal day. People show there true selves when drunk, or when distressed. I am a firm believer in this.

Dr Z, If you feel there may be something, talk to her. Ask her how SHE feels and don't mix your need for companionship with her genuine concern. This could destroy what you have. If she sees you as someone to help and guide through a difficult time, see it as this. Don't be a 'bloke' and try to read something that isn't written.

I do believe you could be together, but I also know women are alot better at giving support to really good friends of the opposite sex than men are, given the same situation.

As for your ex wife. I believe she was feeling terrible about what happened and was looking for someone to blame. Don't take it to heart. I know of several ppl trying to concieve but cannot. It is very desperate for them, and a situation I don't envy. She will, in time recognise what happened was not the fault of you, or her. It wasn't meant to be.

Your mother-in-law missed out on being a grandmother. She probably feels bad, but mothers will believe there children over all others. We are as brainwashed by our parents as they are by us. Ford/Expensive Daewoo anyone??

Que sera sera