wow that's the best e-mail ive EVER read f*ck that's funny as f*ck lololol, that guys a legend! anyway, I get a whole bunch of e-mails from friends that are funny. these are some "global facts about sex" The Global Facts .... At Any Given Moment: Fact: 79,000,000 people are engaged in intercourse right now. Fact: 58,000,000 are kissing. Fact: 37,000,000 are getting/giving oral sex. Fact: 1 lonely bugger is reading emails... You hang in there sunshine! "meaty bites" I've got 2 dogs. I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Big W and was standing in line at the check-out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I said...no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but I did lose 25 kgs before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned by the food. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the middle of the road licking my dick and got hit by a car. I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door. Stupid b*tch...why the f*ck else would I buy dog food??