Mate, Sorry, don't be, the reality is most of us have been through the pain/hurt you are going through and as far away it seems right now everyone is correct re time heals all wounds although at this point you can not see that, I speak of experience myself. The best thing to not do is get into the grog or any other may we say stimulants as I have seen these just exaggerate your emotions. I used the time by first getting myself in better physical shape, you look better and naturally feel better, I worked harder and spent more time with my family. Again you will not see it now but today two yrs on I have found myself engaged to the best women in the world for me and I thought that's what I had in the passed, silly/dum me. Mate believe me the grass is greener on the other side provided we learn from our past imperfect. Keep posting if you want to, we are here. PM me if you need to, Regards